Hi friendz..the protagonist is back from a sabbatical. Though this one was enforced by a B-school schedule which makes sure that every drop of your blood is used up as ink in giving that 'MBA-touch' to assignments and submissions! Got a break for 3 dayz from the classes - something perhaps unheard of in a B-school and then I realized it was time to pen down my thoughts again.
This post I would like to dedicate to the 'priceless' experience of being an MBA student. A few commandments I have come up with to give you a fair idea of being the best B-school student are here:
1) Thou shall forget about Engineering - MBA is not even close in terms of College life!
2) Thou shall erase the words - Sleep, Sex and Supper from your dictionary.
3) Thou shall jargonize the obvious like:
'apna paisa' --> Shareholder's Equity
'udhaar' --> Accounts receivable
A very important skill to learn because these jargons are the foundations on which you are going to build your monument of consulting advices. And the moment the client realizes that when you say "Reduce your Accounts receivable to increase the operating cash in your business cycle" literally means "Udhaar vasoolna shuru karo taaki dhande mei paisa lag sake"; he is not gonna pay you lakhs of bucks just for wearing that 'Reid and Taylor' suit of yours!
4) Thou shall realize that Microsoft Excel and Microsoft Power point are the greatest inventions man has ever made. You can even hide your pathetic english in those Smart Art and cool effects features being offered.
5) Marketing - A subject in which you gonna read 500 page Kotler as your Bible and then realize its all about telling your customer "This is my toothpaste. It will keep your teeth white and healthy for REAL. And rest every other toothpaste is shit." Never knew this could be so difficult to do that we spend 2 years learning it.
6) Thou shall forget the days of being last benchers in Engineering and start participating actively in class discussions. Never mind if you rephrase a point that has already been rephrased 37 times by your classmates - you shall be conferred with an 'ideal MBA student' award.
7) Thou shall be overjoyed to find a chic living next door in a Co-ed hostel, and then brag to your non-MBA friends how you spent last night discussing an assignment with her in her room. But you shall never show her pic to your friendz!
8) Thou shall want desperately to bunk the class in order to catch up on some morning sleep, but then dash towards washroom for a dry clean session when you realize that all 179 of your batch mates are attending it. A dramatic shift from the Enginnering days when this was only done in the last quarter of semester to take the attendance from 40% to 45%
9) Thou shall be surprised to see that every 2nd guy / girl in the batch is Mr./Miss " I-am-James-Bond-and-I will-take-part-in-every-activity" ; again a remarkable difference compared to engineering where this number was restricted to only 15 or 20 ppl in the batch.
10) Being a part of a club / committee is as important as eating food and drinking water, there is no way around it.
11) Thou shall realize that a 10 marks quiz is a question of life and death and almost everybody is willing to skip lunch, dinner, tea and sleep for scoring good in that quiz.
12) Thou shall know that the following 2 years are gonna be screwing as well as fun and learn to run with every ounce of energy in your mind and body to win this infinite rat race.
Well to my Friendz among MBA junta - don't be offended by the post as I have written it all in a lighter vein ;)
To my friendz among Non-MBA junta: This is what I am going through. Imagine the transformation I have had to undergo to be a part of this sorta culture :)
Hasta'la Vista guys!
Thursday, September 9, 2010
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
In the Land of Gods...
In the land of Gods and mystic pines
Exotic rhythm and beauty divine
Catch the heavens - Mounts so high
Bask in the glory of bright blue skies
Breathe in the aroma of air pristine
Sooth your soul in the blanket 'o green
Where musky fragrance of moist ground
and sweet symphony of natis abound
Where people live and don't exist
Where love is first and money - second on the list
Where naive mortals don't kill for a dime
Where faith and hope are objectives prime
Where cultural roots are still intact
and customs and values sacrosanct
Nothing defies the camaraderie we share
The pillar of trust so staunch and rare
I bow down to the legacy of the land
May himachalis conquer and achieve wonders grand.
Exotic rhythm and beauty divine
Catch the heavens - Mounts so high
Bask in the glory of bright blue skies
Breathe in the aroma of air pristine
Sooth your soul in the blanket 'o green
Where musky fragrance of moist ground
and sweet symphony of natis abound
Where people live and don't exist
Where love is first and money - second on the list
Where naive mortals don't kill for a dime
Where faith and hope are objectives prime
Where cultural roots are still intact
and customs and values sacrosanct
Nothing defies the camaraderie we share
The pillar of trust so staunch and rare
I bow down to the legacy of the land
May himachalis conquer and achieve wonders grand.
Saturday, March 6, 2010
Some 'Philo' Shit
This is the series of emails exchanged between me and my pal Jangz..dunno xactly where we were headed but I guess some of you are brave enough to read through all the shit inspite of its dogmatic style. Please do make me understand if you get any of it...I guess we need to see a shrink...
Jangz: (That started it all...)
life is full of imperfections.They say our imperfections make us human.All our lives we keep striving to hit the right notes, work to remove these anomalies.The problem though lies in the fact that no one has actually seen the perfect. Perfect is just a phantom . A creation of our mind.A fixation on something so abstract that any attempt to describe usually ends up as pointless verbiage, literary garbage
Yet we all pretend , pretend to be the perfect son,brother,mother,lover and any other role thrust upon us as a duty, though personally i perceive it as a dogma.We all our covered with stigmata symbolizing the fact that we continue to breathe our lives.
Its only natural then that when cracks appear in this little world of ours we feel scared.All our secret fears come out and there we lay bare our soul without the veils of our million masquerades.
Yet at other times we see our inability to create that perfect little world of ours as a failure. When the truth is there is no perfect.
Frankly dear, life's a bit overrated.
Tapu: (Reply)
Well Well...the dilemma which you have suddenly started ruing about calls for some serious introspection. The imperfections you talking about ...they are basically the fuel for steering this society on the path of progress. None of us fellow mortals would have moved our ass an inch..in case we would have been born into a utopian world. And I guess, we are born..we live and we die living that dream of the 'perfect'...but the undeniable fact remains that this objective remains unfulfilled for every mortal soul. Yet, the moment we are born in this world we are cursed to fall in line and work tooth and nail to grasp and take hold of this mirage of 'perfection'. I guess nothing can be done about that.
We have all been pretending..as you said..to be a perfect son,brother etc etc. .. majority of the population is relishing in this 'matrix' world of ours ...living in denial has become a habit for them and they have accepted this journey to reach that perfection as the only possible way of leading their otherwise worthless lives. Fulfilling their duties in their relationships and expecting the same from every living soul ..this is what 'keeps them on track' towards their 'goal'.
For others like us..who have been sorta 'unplugged' from the 'matrix', we find ourselves perplexed in this cocoon of self banishment. The questions we quite often ask is:
"What exactly was I doing till now? When did I start and what exactly do I intend to achieve? Is this shit all that makes my being meaningful?"
And then when we no longer find ourselves enlightened about these thoughts... we write mails like what you have just written.
I guess life is about something above all the shit we have seen till now.... and I quite agree with what you conclude..that life's a bit overrated..and that there is nothing called 'perfect'..what matters at the end is just the 'truth'...
Jangz: (Reply)
the progress you talk about in just an eye wash , a machiavellian term coined to distract mankind from the true path of progress one which leads man to a state of complete nirvana.
Doesn't it surprise you that the spiritual concepts you follow are still a 2000 yrs old. your beliefs still shackled and have reached an expiry date a long time ago.How come the questions which
haunted our predecessors still remain a mystery even to the 21th century man . materially yes we have progressed we live larger, we travel faster, we build higher heck we even fck longer.
I appreciate the joys of a modern life but our inability to think beyond our own lil perfect world has resulted in stunted spiritual growth .. which infact is the most important progress required.
The perfect men do not question their world since their worlds are perfect. Questioning this notion makes them uncomfortable.
Tapu: (reply)
Hmmm...well for the questions which gave nightmares to our predecessors...they sought answers in spirituality..and a person like me who has a firm belief in our traditional culture strongly advocates the fact that they did get them - partially or fully.
However, as avarice and contempt started overpowering the conscience of mankind, those answers were lost in oblivion. I am not saying that people from that era were unacquainted with these woes that blurred the line between 'right' and 'wrong' ways to achieve one's ends. But, I guess there were quite a few of them who stood their guard against the follies plaguing the society. Enlightened with their knowledge of the 'truth' they sought to tread the right path and guide their brothers along the same. But their voices fell on deaf ears.
Its just that the enlightened guys seem to have become a thing of the past today. And people like you and me are lost in the wilderness trying to find answers with no one to guide us along the path of spiritual nirvana. Fate seems to have bequeathed its veneer of ignorance upon all of us and we are cursed to share the destiny along with all the soul less people out there.
We need to break free of all the shackles and realize the truth. And truth which is not limited to subjective realm of our mind ...but the 'absolute truth'..'universal truth'. Its the ultimate truth that matters. And I hope we find it before we run out of time....
Jangz : (Reply)
Hmm herein lies the fallacy.. it's the longing to achieve the unachievable which i am against.. why are u searching for the perfect world.. where every thing has a reason a defined beginning a defined end??...Can ur mind accept there is no absolute truth . truth infact is a lie since it changes along as ur perception changes.
Tapu: (Reply)
Well in fact here we should agree to disagree a bit. I believe there exists some ultimate truth which needs to be unlocked. Some pandora's box which needs to be opened. Had there been no such truth...how can u explain the existence of all life - real or surreal? Life has a definite beginning and a definite end. For what purpose? And for that matter...even if what you are telling is true..doesn't the realization of this very fact (stated by you ) by a living being amount to realization of the ultimate truth?
Ah Well...if you have reached this point after reading through all the preaching above and then finally making some sense of it, I bow down before you and beg for forgiveness, for I made fun of you guys in my first post.
For those who reached here flying straight out of first para and then skimming through the first few lines (and then saying in your mind - " This guy is fucking nuts")..I like your attitude..Life is too short to be taken so seriously.
Well..Adios! till I come around with something interesting..Till then enjoyy..
Thank you all :)
Jangz: (That started it all...)
life is full of imperfections.They say our imperfections make us human.All our lives we keep striving to hit the right notes, work to remove these anomalies.The problem though lies in the fact that no one has actually seen the perfect. Perfect is just a phantom . A creation of our mind.A fixation on something so abstract that any attempt to describe usually ends up as pointless verbiage, literary garbage
Yet we all pretend , pretend to be the perfect son,brother,mother,lover and any other role thrust upon us as a duty, though personally i perceive it as a dogma.We all our covered with stigmata symbolizing the fact that we continue to breathe our lives.
Its only natural then that when cracks appear in this little world of ours we feel scared.All our secret fears come out and there we lay bare our soul without the veils of our million masquerades.
Yet at other times we see our inability to create that perfect little world of ours as a failure. When the truth is there is no perfect.
Frankly dear, life's a bit overrated.
Tapu: (Reply)
Well Well...the dilemma which you have suddenly started ruing about calls for some serious introspection. The imperfections you talking about ...they are basically the fuel for steering this society on the path of progress. None of us fellow mortals would have moved our ass an inch..in case we would have been born into a utopian world. And I guess, we are born..we live and we die living that dream of the 'perfect'...but the undeniable fact remains that this objective remains unfulfilled for every mortal soul. Yet, the moment we are born in this world we are cursed to fall in line and work tooth and nail to grasp and take hold of this mirage of 'perfection'. I guess nothing can be done about that.
We have all been pretending..as you said..to be a perfect son,brother etc etc. .. majority of the population is relishing in this 'matrix' world of ours ...living in denial has become a habit for them and they have accepted this journey to reach that perfection as the only possible way of leading their otherwise worthless lives. Fulfilling their duties in their relationships and expecting the same from every living soul ..this is what 'keeps them on track' towards their 'goal'.
For others like us..who have been sorta 'unplugged' from the 'matrix', we find ourselves perplexed in this cocoon of self banishment. The questions we quite often ask is:
"What exactly was I doing till now? When did I start and what exactly do I intend to achieve? Is this shit all that makes my being meaningful?"
And then when we no longer find ourselves enlightened about these thoughts... we write mails like what you have just written.
I guess life is about something above all the shit we have seen till now.... and I quite agree with what you conclude..that life's a bit overrated..and that there is nothing called 'perfect'..what matters at the end is just the 'truth'...
Jangz: (Reply)
the progress you talk about in just an eye wash , a machiavellian term coined to distract mankind from the true path of progress one which leads man to a state of complete nirvana.
Doesn't it surprise you that the spiritual concepts you follow are still a 2000 yrs old. your beliefs still shackled and have reached an expiry date a long time ago.How come the questions which
haunted our predecessors still remain a mystery even to the 21th century man . materially yes we have progressed we live larger, we travel faster, we build higher heck we even fck longer.
I appreciate the joys of a modern life but our inability to think beyond our own lil perfect world has resulted in stunted spiritual growth .. which infact is the most important progress required.
The perfect men do not question their world since their worlds are perfect. Questioning this notion makes them uncomfortable.
Tapu: (reply)
Hmmm...well for the questions which gave nightmares to our predecessors...they sought answers in spirituality..and a person like me who has a firm belief in our traditional culture strongly advocates the fact that they did get them - partially or fully.
However, as avarice and contempt started overpowering the conscience of mankind, those answers were lost in oblivion. I am not saying that people from that era were unacquainted with these woes that blurred the line between 'right' and 'wrong' ways to achieve one's ends. But, I guess there were quite a few of them who stood their guard against the follies plaguing the society. Enlightened with their knowledge of the 'truth' they sought to tread the right path and guide their brothers along the same. But their voices fell on deaf ears.
Its just that the enlightened guys seem to have become a thing of the past today. And people like you and me are lost in the wilderness trying to find answers with no one to guide us along the path of spiritual nirvana. Fate seems to have bequeathed its veneer of ignorance upon all of us and we are cursed to share the destiny along with all the soul less people out there.
We need to break free of all the shackles and realize the truth. And truth which is not limited to subjective realm of our mind ...but the 'absolute truth'..'universal truth'. Its the ultimate truth that matters. And I hope we find it before we run out of time....
Jangz : (Reply)
Hmm herein lies the fallacy.. it's the longing to achieve the unachievable which i am against.. why are u searching for the perfect world.. where every thing has a reason a defined beginning a defined end??...Can ur mind accept there is no absolute truth . truth infact is a lie since it changes along as ur perception changes.
Tapu: (Reply)
Well in fact here we should agree to disagree a bit. I believe there exists some ultimate truth which needs to be unlocked. Some pandora's box which needs to be opened. Had there been no such truth...how can u explain the existence of all life - real or surreal? Life has a definite beginning and a definite end. For what purpose? And for that matter...even if what you are telling is true..doesn't the realization of this very fact (stated by you ) by a living being amount to realization of the ultimate truth?
Ah Well...if you have reached this point after reading through all the preaching above and then finally making some sense of it, I bow down before you and beg for forgiveness, for I made fun of you guys in my first post.
For those who reached here flying straight out of first para and then skimming through the first few lines (and then saying in your mind - " This guy is fucking nuts")..I like your attitude..Life is too short to be taken so seriously.
Well..Adios! till I come around with something interesting..Till then enjoyy..
Thank you all :)
Thursday, February 25, 2010
Immortal Maestro
A charming soldier with innocuous face
Eyes sparkling with glory and grace.
Maestro walked down the field 'o green
Twenty Years, still firm and lean.
Crowd welcomed with rapturous applause
Time stood by to take a pause.
His forehead glistened with seasoned sweat
Bowlers shivered of ineludible threat.
Sword in hand, feet across crease
His eyes scanned for gaps of ease.
Humble Master stood his ground
A few seconds to beauty abound.
The show began, elegance was redefined
Confluence of body and heart, soul and mind.
Bowlers bowled, crowd roared
Flawlessly connected, bowl raced to four.
He flicked, he glanced, he drove, he sliced
Be it Gully, Long Off or Mid-wicket, he left no side.
Kallis jittered - was left astound
But his wagon-wheel went round and round.
Bowlers prayed to catch him low
But I guess Gods were engrossed in the resplendent show.
Treat to millions, we savoured each shot
Beyond a doubt, we were the privileged lot.
Twenty Years shouldering resilience and might
100 Crore dreams ain't so light.
Still, nothing but excellence - he will chase
And we salute his passion and craze.
Mortals came - and went away
But the epitome of talent is here to stay.
World has its prodigy, some call him player
We call him God a.k.a SACHIN TENDULKAR.
- Dedicated to our Hero on being immortal in cricketing history.
Saturday, February 13, 2010
....I call it "SEXUAL INDEPENDENCE"......
Hahaha....Quite a few of you would have navigated up to this page intrigued by the title. (Well, that is my subjective conclusion which I arrived upon after keeping myself in your shoes. Because knowing myself as a 'pervert', I would have easily given in to the temptation of reading anything related to the forbidden three letter word - 'SEX'. And I think there are quite a few 'perverts' like me out there :P )
Ok..now let me get to the point:
After hell of a brainstorming (thats what I call it when I am thinking of some of the most futile subjects in this world) , I have formed a firm opinion on one aspect of the psyche of Indian youth (that includes me) - we love scandals, we love scripted dramas (read Roadies, Splitsvilla and so called similar 'reality TV' shit), we love when we get to see dirty linen from celebrities bedrooms hung out in the open and we love 'onscreen candidness'. Candidness as is expressed in the following few dialogues from most of the reality shows being aired these days:
1) Fuck You ..........! (usually used by the fairer sex with the word 'Bitch' following)
2) Saale #$%@#$, yahan kya #$#@#% mraane aya hai??
3) Teri @#@##$% ki ##$@%$
And most of the guys respond to this by commenting "Iss bande/bandi mei attitude hai. Sahi hai. Faadu. Har Kuch Yaar".
I find two reasons that explain the current mania to my feeble mind:
First, there is no room for mediocrity. Go for extremes. As a program manager for a TV channel, if you want your TRPs soaring and cash registers for sponsors ringing - air shitty dramatic reality TV shows or some real classic movie or informative debate. Guys are gonna watch only 2 things - 'Rahul ka swayamvar - Season 2' on NDTV Imagine or the the movie 'Crash' on HBO. While the latter is relished and enjoyed in a genuine fashion, the former is mocked and watched to fathom the limits to which channel editors are willing to stoop in order to manipulate the gullible masses in order to keep them glued to the idiot box day in and day out. And believe me..this works!
Second, media carries out the task of publicizing and marketing the whole content in such a compelling manner that even the Gods may be taken for a ride, what to say of fellow mortals.
All the content - be it a TV show, some spicy news or the what, where and when about the sex romps of celebrities- everything is perfectly edited, cut into pieces and served episode by episode like a sumptuous pizza to whet our insatiable appetite. This in turn gives birth to what we call 'vox populi'.
John Terry and Tiger Woods were blasted by the media for their promiscuous ways. In a matter of hours, people start castigating them with the former loosing his captaincy and latter on the verge of loosing half his wealth as alimony. Why cant people accept the fact that at the end of the day, they are humans like us who have their feet of clay and not saints - as we want them to be ?
Give me some fucking soul walking on the face of this earth who can be a better center back defender, doubling up as attacking midfielder when needed and be the heart and soul of one of the top EPL clubs - or some golfer who is trailing by seven strokes with seven holes to play and then finishes eagle-birdie-par-birdie for a 64 and a two-stroke victory and then I shall bother who is sleeping with whom.
Media...they just know how to serve even the most sour recipes in a manner that always leave us licking our fingers and waiting to devour more of it. And as for their reach for such stuff, I dont think I need to advise you to lock up your toilet while you poop - or you may have a media guy standing besides you and recording your ..........................................!! Guess Yourself!
Wrapping up, I have no qualms against media or my generation. I am just trying to make a point that today's media not only feeds our desires..but shapes them too..
In addition, I am not advocating that sleeping around with every sexy chick you encounter is a very 'macho' thing to do, but I shall leave that aspect open to discussion for some other post.
A real insightful dialogue delivered by my fellow 'intellectual' roomie Jangz when we had a discussion on this aspect was " You call this lasciviousness....I call it 'SEXUAL INDEPENDENCE'....
Thanks..one and all!
Ok..now let me get to the point:
After hell of a brainstorming (thats what I call it when I am thinking of some of the most futile subjects in this world) , I have formed a firm opinion on one aspect of the psyche of Indian youth (that includes me) - we love scandals, we love scripted dramas (read Roadies, Splitsvilla and so called similar 'reality TV' shit), we love when we get to see dirty linen from celebrities bedrooms hung out in the open and we love 'onscreen candidness'. Candidness as is expressed in the following few dialogues from most of the reality shows being aired these days:
1) Fuck You ..........! (usually used by the fairer sex with the word 'Bitch' following)
2) Saale #$%@#$, yahan kya #$#@#% mraane aya hai??
3) Teri @#@##$% ki ##$@%$
And most of the guys respond to this by commenting "Iss bande/bandi mei attitude hai. Sahi hai. Faadu. Har Kuch Yaar".
I find two reasons that explain the current mania to my feeble mind:
First, there is no room for mediocrity. Go for extremes. As a program manager for a TV channel, if you want your TRPs soaring and cash registers for sponsors ringing - air shitty dramatic reality TV shows or some real classic movie or informative debate. Guys are gonna watch only 2 things - 'Rahul ka swayamvar - Season 2' on NDTV Imagine or the the movie 'Crash' on HBO. While the latter is relished and enjoyed in a genuine fashion, the former is mocked and watched to fathom the limits to which channel editors are willing to stoop in order to manipulate the gullible masses in order to keep them glued to the idiot box day in and day out. And believe me..this works!
Second, media carries out the task of publicizing and marketing the whole content in such a compelling manner that even the Gods may be taken for a ride, what to say of fellow mortals.
All the content - be it a TV show, some spicy news or the what, where and when about the sex romps of celebrities- everything is perfectly edited, cut into pieces and served episode by episode like a sumptuous pizza to whet our insatiable appetite. This in turn gives birth to what we call 'vox populi'.
John Terry and Tiger Woods were blasted by the media for their promiscuous ways. In a matter of hours, people start castigating them with the former loosing his captaincy and latter on the verge of loosing half his wealth as alimony. Why cant people accept the fact that at the end of the day, they are humans like us who have their feet of clay and not saints - as we want them to be ?
Give me some fucking soul walking on the face of this earth who can be a better center back defender, doubling up as attacking midfielder when needed and be the heart and soul of one of the top EPL clubs - or some golfer who is trailing by seven strokes with seven holes to play and then finishes eagle-birdie-par-birdie for a 64 and a two-stroke victory and then I shall bother who is sleeping with whom.
Media...they just know how to serve even the most sour recipes in a manner that always leave us licking our fingers and waiting to devour more of it. And as for their reach for such stuff, I dont think I need to advise you to lock up your toilet while you poop - or you may have a media guy standing besides you and recording your ..........................................!! Guess Yourself!
Wrapping up, I have no qualms against media or my generation. I am just trying to make a point that today's media not only feeds our desires..but shapes them too..
In addition, I am not advocating that sleeping around with every sexy chick you encounter is a very 'macho' thing to do, but I shall leave that aspect open to discussion for some other post.
A real insightful dialogue delivered by my fellow 'intellectual' roomie Jangz when we had a discussion on this aspect was " You call this lasciviousness....I call it 'SEXUAL INDEPENDENCE'....
Thanks..one and all!
Friday, January 29, 2010
180 seconds to glory...
What follows is the series of events that take place in 180 seconds in the virtual world of de_dust 2 where some of the most skillful souls battle for supremacy, honor and glory, while the aficionados look on . . . . . .
0:10 - 0:00 ( Freeze Time)
An echo of a series of successive strokes on keyboard breaks through the reticence engulfing the room
------------- B-4-6-O-2-O-3-O-3-O-4-O-5-O-7 ---------------
Headphones come to life with a crackling noise; the strategy is spelled out by the prudent mortal within the squad. For the next 180 seconds, this is to be followed like the 'Bible'. With a sigh that seems to last forever, I pass a fleeting glance to my fingers ensuring they are well placed on W-A-S-D; keys that have been left with no trace of these alphabets on them. As a passing thought, I wonder if my keyboard has antiquated or if it has become an evidence of my passion. Then, with a black Logitech WMD (weapon of mass destruction) gripped firmly under my right hand, I get ready to put an end to life of the unlucky souls among the 5 'enemies'.
Let what the people call a 'game' begin....
3:00-2:00 (Stealth)
Press '1' - Knife. I race towards my right. Next 10 seconds may decide the course of the game. I stand at the acutest angle possible and aim towards T-spawn through the central double doors (DD); click-click - double zoom. Smoke waiting for me - expected - not a trace of bloody T's. I try hard to concentrate in the stentorian chatter piercing my ears - these status updates on 4 different areas in the arena will decide my next movement in about 30 seconds. Acknowledgment is a must - C1
15 seconds up. A macabre silence is on. All I can hear is my own tense and heavy breathing. Time for sneak-a-peek! Call in to fellow positioned at B double doors (he shall be called 'M' from now on). In about 7 seconds, he squats at an angle of about 30 degrees from Centrall DD - Press 'Space' - 'Cntrl' - m on his back. Click-Click. Someone is gonna die in next few seconds. I can feel it!
A flash is hurtled through the doors; I respond by turning around - virtually as well as in person.
Exposure time - Now! I am quick to regain my aim in a second - another smoke. (I have double zoom - remember?? Yes..show yourself asshole!) The following split second witnesses these events concurrently - A shadow moves , my eyes flutter, and time freezes. Click - Boom. The noise echoes across the arena and 2 names appear in the upper right corner with the deadly Awp symbol between them.
Encomiums pour in..but I am too busy revelling in the ecstasy of the moment.
2:00 - 1:00 (Bloodshed)
Next 30 seconds pass in what seems like an eternity. Not a single sound to be heard. Headphone is buzzing with the cacophony of Z3 - Hold your Position! I am stranded at CT spot, trying to predict the Kurukshetra of battle - Bombsite 'A' or 'B'. With seconds passing like hours and dearth of quality action, my mind begins to wander - 'Riya was looking hot today...'
And then..terror strikes! My screen flashes red and I see a countdown timer running in bottom left corner. Wtf! I am freezed in the gunfire from across the central DD and I cant even spot the Satan! Spamming. Shit!
I take a clumsy shot at bottom right corner of the door. Firing stops. In a fraction of a second, my Index finger rises - presses '4': O-4 - HG; aim - throw. Boom! I hear receding footsteps into B-tunnel. Bloody T must have got his arse fried. In addition to fucking my health down to 56.
I take cover in the 'safe' and dark haven of CT spawn. This bloodshed was uncalled for.
Meanwhile , somewhere near A DD, battle ensues between AK 47 and Maverick M4A1 carbine. Loud roar of the former and squeaky silencer of the latter can be distinctly heard. 10 seconds later, my fellow m8's name occupies the column on the top right..1 Down...
1:00 -0:10 (Triumph)
4 vs 4 now. If there is something known as a blitzkrieg of wits and instincts, I am gonna be an active witness in the next 60 seconds.
'B Storm' - A shriek extreme enough to cause an aneurysm penetrates my ears.
5 seconds and 3 flashbangs later, we are ready to engage in the bloodbath, which utopian logic says, should be one-sided affair -blind enemy at our crosshairs. However, like always, not everything happens as expected. T's hold back the storm in B tunnel, till the whiteness blurs. I crouch at an oblique position outside B Dbl Doors. Click - Click - Zoom at tunnel entrance. My fellows braving the odds with Maverick M4 A1 take positions - one behind the last box on the raised platform, other in the perforation above bomb-site. Minimum exposure with Maximum visibility angle - strategy is supposed to be fool-proof and we have spent 'hours' - oops! sorry - '2 years' perfecting it.
And then it happens - they jump out of tunnel in what seems like a somersault. I was ready. Exactly 1 second later, one jump and 1 click happens in unison and dusty wall on the other side gets splattered in red. I think it went right between his eyes. Another follows - miss - 16 health - fck!
I take a step aside - still shielded from full view by the Double Doors. Mr. M is next to make it to the deceased list. 2 flamboyant headshots from Mr. J follow: sealing the stamp of our victory in enemies coffin. Now all that was needed was to nail it hard.
What happens next left my legs numb. 2 sniper shots pastes 2 of my teamm8s name in the top right corner. Both of them at gap of what I think - a microsecond? I start feeling dizzy recalling the events of past few seconds:
T's were being protected of the back attack by Mr. Vassili Zaitsev. And just now he hasblown apart our back attack strategy to shards, in a split second.
1 on 1. Believe me, no one likes this! With 20 seconds left, my mind races. Bomb has dropped right in front of my eyes. He needs it , he has nowwhere to go - and he needs it fast. I race to take advantage by taking zoom right into the mouth of B-tunnel entry, but he knows that - it is a battle of nerves rather than strategy now.
My palms are dripping with sweat and my toes are digging inside my slippers.
It happens far earlier then I expected - both of us expose ourselves, vulnerable, our proximity defying all logic, ready to kill or die in vain. Click - click -zoom. Boom!
The shot must have left everybody numb in both the camps. I feel like something has hit me in reality.
And then he drops down on floor - dead. Apparently, this last 'Click - click - zoom' was the sound at his end. I had done it without the right click.
My room felt hazy now. This bliss is eternal.....
0:10 - 0:00 ( Freeze Time)
An echo of a series of successive strokes on keyboard breaks through the reticence engulfing the room
------------- B-4-6-O-2-O-3-O-3-O-4-O-5-O-7 ---------------
Headphones come to life with a crackling noise; the strategy is spelled out by the prudent mortal within the squad. For the next 180 seconds, this is to be followed like the 'Bible'. With a sigh that seems to last forever, I pass a fleeting glance to my fingers ensuring they are well placed on W-A-S-D; keys that have been left with no trace of these alphabets on them. As a passing thought, I wonder if my keyboard has antiquated or if it has become an evidence of my passion. Then, with a black Logitech WMD (weapon of mass destruction) gripped firmly under my right hand, I get ready to put an end to life of the unlucky souls among the 5 'enemies'.
Let what the people call a 'game' begin....
3:00-2:00 (Stealth)
Press '1' - Knife. I race towards my right. Next 10 seconds may decide the course of the game. I stand at the acutest angle possible and aim towards T-spawn through the central double doors (DD); click-click - double zoom. Smoke waiting for me - expected - not a trace of bloody T's. I try hard to concentrate in the stentorian chatter piercing my ears - these status updates on 4 different areas in the arena will decide my next movement in about 30 seconds. Acknowledgment is a must - C1
15 seconds up. A macabre silence is on. All I can hear is my own tense and heavy breathing. Time for sneak-a-peek! Call in to fellow positioned at B double doors (he shall be called 'M' from now on). In about 7 seconds, he squats at an angle of about 30 degrees from Centrall DD - Press 'Space' - 'Cntrl' - m on his back. Click-Click. Someone is gonna die in next few seconds. I can feel it!
A flash is hurtled through the doors; I respond by turning around - virtually as well as in person.
Exposure time - Now! I am quick to regain my aim in a second - another smoke. (I have double zoom - remember?? Yes..show yourself asshole!) The following split second witnesses these events concurrently - A shadow moves , my eyes flutter, and time freezes. Click - Boom. The noise echoes across the arena and 2 names appear in the upper right corner with the deadly Awp symbol between them.
Encomiums pour in..but I am too busy revelling in the ecstasy of the moment.
2:00 - 1:00 (Bloodshed)
Next 30 seconds pass in what seems like an eternity. Not a single sound to be heard. Headphone is buzzing with the cacophony of Z3 - Hold your Position! I am stranded at CT spot, trying to predict the Kurukshetra of battle - Bombsite 'A' or 'B'. With seconds passing like hours and dearth of quality action, my mind begins to wander - 'Riya was looking hot today...'
And then..terror strikes! My screen flashes red and I see a countdown timer running in bottom left corner. Wtf! I am freezed in the gunfire from across the central DD and I cant even spot the Satan! Spamming. Shit!
I take a clumsy shot at bottom right corner of the door. Firing stops. In a fraction of a second, my Index finger rises - presses '4': O-4 - HG; aim - throw. Boom! I hear receding footsteps into B-tunnel. Bloody T must have got his arse fried. In addition to fucking my health down to 56.
I take cover in the 'safe' and dark haven of CT spawn. This bloodshed was uncalled for.
Meanwhile , somewhere near A DD, battle ensues between AK 47 and Maverick M4A1 carbine. Loud roar of the former and squeaky silencer of the latter can be distinctly heard. 10 seconds later, my fellow m8's name occupies the column on the top right..1 Down...
1:00 -0:10 (Triumph)
4 vs 4 now. If there is something known as a blitzkrieg of wits and instincts, I am gonna be an active witness in the next 60 seconds.
'B Storm' - A shriek extreme enough to cause an aneurysm penetrates my ears.
5 seconds and 3 flashbangs later, we are ready to engage in the bloodbath, which utopian logic says, should be one-sided affair -blind enemy at our crosshairs. However, like always, not everything happens as expected. T's hold back the storm in B tunnel, till the whiteness blurs. I crouch at an oblique position outside B Dbl Doors. Click - Click - Zoom at tunnel entrance. My fellows braving the odds with Maverick M4 A1 take positions - one behind the last box on the raised platform, other in the perforation above bomb-site. Minimum exposure with Maximum visibility angle - strategy is supposed to be fool-proof and we have spent 'hours' - oops! sorry - '2 years' perfecting it.
And then it happens - they jump out of tunnel in what seems like a somersault. I was ready. Exactly 1 second later, one jump and 1 click happens in unison and dusty wall on the other side gets splattered in red. I think it went right between his eyes. Another follows - miss - 16 health - fck!
I take a step aside - still shielded from full view by the Double Doors. Mr. M is next to make it to the deceased list. 2 flamboyant headshots from Mr. J follow: sealing the stamp of our victory in enemies coffin. Now all that was needed was to nail it hard.
What happens next left my legs numb. 2 sniper shots pastes 2 of my teamm8s name in the top right corner. Both of them at gap of what I think - a microsecond? I start feeling dizzy recalling the events of past few seconds:
T's were being protected of the back attack by Mr. Vassili Zaitsev. And just now he hasblown apart our back attack strategy to shards, in a split second.
1 on 1. Believe me, no one likes this! With 20 seconds left, my mind races. Bomb has dropped right in front of my eyes. He needs it , he has nowwhere to go - and he needs it fast. I race to take advantage by taking zoom right into the mouth of B-tunnel entry, but he knows that - it is a battle of nerves rather than strategy now.
My palms are dripping with sweat and my toes are digging inside my slippers.
It happens far earlier then I expected - both of us expose ourselves, vulnerable, our proximity defying all logic, ready to kill or die in vain. Click - click -zoom. Boom!
The shot must have left everybody numb in both the camps. I feel like something has hit me in reality.
And then he drops down on floor - dead. Apparently, this last 'Click - click - zoom' was the sound at his end. I had done it without the right click.
My room felt hazy now. This bliss is eternal.....
PS: A bit long post and obviously not enjoying universal readership. Dedicated to the splendid
players I have played with in my college. Not as good as I expected it to be. But still a worthy memorabilia. Thanks to all your overwhelming responses to my last post.
players I have played with in my college. Not as good as I expected it to be. But still a worthy memorabilia. Thanks to all your overwhelming responses to my last post.
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
B L A A A A G No. 1
Ok...Let me get this straight. Considering the fact that you have stumbled upon this web-page in your browser, I can safely make 2 assumptions:
Assumption 1:--> That all you fellow mortals have completed your mundane activities on Internet which include, but are not limited to, 'scrapping' on Orkut, checking FB profile of that cute chic ( and then feeling disheartened bcoz you don't have access to her Pics..Damn this new privacy feature on FB!), checked the latest EPL standings on goal.com and finally, zeroed in on the movie you are gonna watch while you hit the sack today.
After all, tell me 1 person in this whole wide world who is gonna read this blog until he has nothing better to do on Internet.
Assumption 2:--> The moment you clicked on this page's URL, you thought " Oh! here we go..another idiot who is gonna bore me with his " My experiments with Life", "Thoughtful Moments" and blah! blah! blah! on this web-page. As if I don't get enough of that philosophy from my Boss at office. God knows why every tom, dick and harry thinks he can write a blog today - and as if people are gonna read their shit. Anyways, since I am bored like hell, let me have a look what this jerk has to say about "Life". Arghhh!"
And for all those who don't fall in any of the above categories and still managed to reach this page
out of good-will or the pathetic reputation my writing enjoys among my peers, I promise those intellectuals that this blog will savour your precious click for days to come.
Well, no offence to the adroit bloggers out there but the thing I fail to understand is what harm a little jocular approach towards writing would do to them? While this allegation may be based on unsubstantiated evidence, partly because I am not much of a blogging enthusiast, but what prompted me to write this piece is the fact that nearly every blog I have ever visited (pardon me for I have not visited too many of them) has little else but philosophical lessons we learn from everyday life.
I don't know about people but what I want when I am reading a literary creation is the ability to connect with it. Why is it so that when I visit any blog, I am forced to reinvent my conscience? If there is a poem with a nice rhyming scheme, there are a string of comments below, most of them throwing in comments full of admiration without even knowing what exactly the composition is about.
Its like those 3 books of Chetan Bhagat. The first '5 point someone' was genuinely a masterpiece. Next 2 books, not so good. But every discussion I hear about them, people go like " Oh! Chetan Bhagat wrote it? What else can it be, but masterpiece!" And they won't even remember title of that book 5 minutes from now.
The same problem plagued my college magazine. Since the 'hot-shot' editors were declared 'intellectual geeks' of our institute, so if your article was accepted, you would have thrown a bash in jubilation. A literary genius indeed! And when the magazine was circulated among the students, 90% guys labeled the magazine as " main aur meri tanhayee" - by "EDITOR in Chief"
End Result: The best our college magazine did was bite dust in some dilapidated drawer, only seeing the light of the day when there was no paper to spare for cleaning the dusty almirah. Reason was evident: They failed to connect with it. What they wanted was some real spicy stuff out f campus activities and something to discuss ova that evening bacchanalian celebrations - not moral lessons.
Well, all said and done, I would say that many of you ( in fact I fear majority of you) wont agree to my views and would even castigate me for the same,but the freedom of expression is what BLAAAGING is all about. Ain't it?
PS: Please feel free to comment. (Yaar saare khap na chknaa..1-2 toh taariff kar dena..bhai 1 ghnta lgaya ye sab likhne mei..smjha karooo..11)
Assumption 1:--> That all you fellow mortals have completed your mundane activities on Internet which include, but are not limited to, 'scrapping' on Orkut, checking FB profile of that cute chic ( and then feeling disheartened bcoz you don't have access to her Pics..Damn this new privacy feature on FB!), checked the latest EPL standings on goal.com and finally, zeroed in on the movie you are gonna watch while you hit the sack today.
After all, tell me 1 person in this whole wide world who is gonna read this blog until he has nothing better to do on Internet.
Assumption 2:--> The moment you clicked on this page's URL, you thought " Oh! here we go..another idiot who is gonna bore me with his " My experiments with Life", "Thoughtful Moments" and blah! blah! blah! on this web-page. As if I don't get enough of that philosophy from my Boss at office. God knows why every tom, dick and harry thinks he can write a blog today - and as if people are gonna read their shit. Anyways, since I am bored like hell, let me have a look what this jerk has to say about "Life". Arghhh!"
And for all those who don't fall in any of the above categories and still managed to reach this page
out of good-will or the pathetic reputation my writing enjoys among my peers, I promise those intellectuals that this blog will savour your precious click for days to come.
Well, no offence to the adroit bloggers out there but the thing I fail to understand is what harm a little jocular approach towards writing would do to them? While this allegation may be based on unsubstantiated evidence, partly because I am not much of a blogging enthusiast, but what prompted me to write this piece is the fact that nearly every blog I have ever visited (pardon me for I have not visited too many of them) has little else but philosophical lessons we learn from everyday life.
I don't know about people but what I want when I am reading a literary creation is the ability to connect with it. Why is it so that when I visit any blog, I am forced to reinvent my conscience? If there is a poem with a nice rhyming scheme, there are a string of comments below, most of them throwing in comments full of admiration without even knowing what exactly the composition is about.
Its like those 3 books of Chetan Bhagat. The first '5 point someone' was genuinely a masterpiece. Next 2 books, not so good. But every discussion I hear about them, people go like " Oh! Chetan Bhagat wrote it? What else can it be, but masterpiece!" And they won't even remember title of that book 5 minutes from now.
The same problem plagued my college magazine. Since the 'hot-shot' editors were declared 'intellectual geeks' of our institute, so if your article was accepted, you would have thrown a bash in jubilation. A literary genius indeed! And when the magazine was circulated among the students, 90% guys labeled the magazine as " main aur meri tanhayee" - by "EDITOR in Chief"
End Result: The best our college magazine did was bite dust in some dilapidated drawer, only seeing the light of the day when there was no paper to spare for cleaning the dusty almirah. Reason was evident: They failed to connect with it. What they wanted was some real spicy stuff out f campus activities and something to discuss ova that evening bacchanalian celebrations - not moral lessons.
Well, all said and done, I would say that many of you ( in fact I fear majority of you) wont agree to my views and would even castigate me for the same,but the freedom of expression is what BLAAAGING is all about. Ain't it?
PS: Please feel free to comment. (Yaar saare khap na chknaa..1-2 toh taariff kar dena..bhai 1 ghnta lgaya ye sab likhne mei..smjha karooo..11)
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